“If I loved you less, I might be able to talk about it more.” Emma by Jane Austen
It was a 21st century romance acted out in 19th century fashion. In the beginning all we had were words. There weren’t any pictures, videos or friends in common. The tools that we normally used to evaluate others weren’t available.
We couldn’t rely upon an in person experiences to provide any sort of feedback about each other. We didn’t meet in a bar, restaurant, class or party. You couldn’t tell your friends about the cute guy you saw and I couldn’t tell the boys about those pretty eyes I like to stare at.
All that we had were the words on a page. The words that we used to craft thoughts and ideas about life, children, relationships, politics and so much more were all that we had. Others vehemently disagreed with us and from behind their keyboards launched vicious attacks.
No one could have guessed that the slings and arrows push us into an alliance. Together we composed our responses to their comments and pointed out the flaws in their arguments. Behind the scenes we sent out private messages expressing our incredulity at the illogical and oft times hysterical rantings of the others.
And when their responses became personal in nature we laughed because it confirmed our beliefs that they had nothing to stand upon. Although we didn’t realize it, their responses provided concrete and evidentiary support that we made a great team.
More time passed and we continued to build upon our earlier successes. They continued to launch all out assaults upon us. They attacked our character and our virtue. They made allegations about things they knew nothing of and we didn’t falter.
When I think back upon that time I realize that was one of the earliest signs I had that I had developed feelings for you. I didn’t care what they said about me but I cared about you. It didn’t matter that you told me that you didn’t care because I was raised to respond to those things.
I think that they were shocked when I went after them so aggressively. I am certain that if we could have seen their faces they would been standing their slack jawed and dumbfounded by my words. In the common parlance it would have been deemed a disproportionate response, but it sent a very clear message.
No one was allowed to mess with you without consequence. I enjoyed being your knight protector, even during those times when I knew that you didn’t need or want it.
We talked about whether it was destiny or coincidence. We wanted to call it destiny. It felt right and it felt good. But when you spend time working on things that are real it is hard to rely upon the intangible. It was always easier for me to grab those wisps of smoke and call them real.
It is part of why we make such a good team. You look at the facts and analyze them. You pore over and catch the little details that I don’t always see. I come up with the big dreams and conceive of ways to actually capture the intangible and turn it into something concrete.
Together we complement the other and provide the kind of team that you don’t stumble upon. A partnership that is far deeper than a handshake and more substantial than a piece of paper.
And to think that in the beginning all that we had were words……….