The 198,383th time I heard that pride goeth before a fall I made a face and pretended to hang myself. Blame it upon the arrogance of youth.
I hadn’t yet learned that life has a way of humbling us and that it was the sort of education that wasn’t very pleasant.
You see I fell in love with a girl and I loved her fiercely. I loved her madly. I loved her passionately. I loved her in every way that the poets wrote of, spoke of and dreamed of.
I loved her with all of my heart and all of my soul. I loved her desperately and somewhere in that madness I lost her.
We were much younger then and no one could have predicted that things would go as they did. I wasn’t her type and she wasn’t mine. Not unlike so many other couples on paper we had everything in common and nothing in common.
I can’t tell you if there are soul mates or things are meant to be but I can say that if there is a master chemist they created the perfect mix of magic. It wasn’t just because there was a ridiculous amount of lust but because we liked each other.
It is just before dawn and we are lying in bed. My flight leaves in five hours. In a few minutes you’ll wake up and we’ll engage in some early morning exercise.
Midway through my shower you’ll join me and try to convince me not to leave. I’ll look down and we’ll make eye contact and I’ll think I am crazy to leave, but I’ll force myself to be strong.
“I love you baby, but I can’t pass this up. I have to give it a shot and I can’t ask you to wait for me.”
Tears well in her eyes and she tells me that it is a mistake. She says that I should wait a bit longer and she’ll be able to come with me.
I smile and hug her.
“I want to get things started. It is for our future.”
She nods her head but I miss the look in her eyes. This isn’t her being understanding. She has already decided that if I insist on going she will too. She is ready to build a life and wants to start now.
Years later I see clearly what I missed then. The future I wanted to build disintegrated that day.
I made a mistake.
This is part of Yeah Write #70