He wasn’t sure if he should call and let her know he was going to be in town. It was a quick business trip and he wasn’t sure how much time he would have let alone whether she would be free to meet him.
They were in that funny place that is only understood by those who have fallen in love with someone who they haven’t been able to spend time with. Circumstances had thus far prevented them from living life together but that didn’t mean it would always be that way.
Or at least that was his approach. She didn’t always take the same perspective or at least she didn’t voice it. He always believed she hoped that was true but that she wouldn’t voice it because it was easier to protect her heart by not saying it out loud. Silence made it easier to adopt lesser expectations.
It hurt to think about being in town and not seeing her but he wondered if maybe that would make it easier for her. She wouldn’t have to wonder or worry about being asked to come back to his room and he wouldn’t have to worry about being rejected if he did.
But if she found out he had come to town and not called she would be hurt too. Not telling her he was going to be there was different from giving her a choice to see or not see him.
And if he was honest with himself he had no doubt that she would see him. Nor did he doubt that if he tried to kiss her she would kiss him back.
She might ask him not to. She might suggest he keep his distance but it wasn’t because she didn’t want to and that was the issue, or maybe it wasn’t.
He loved to call her his girl, especially because of the smile she would give him when he did but she was very much a grown woman who had no trouble making decisions for herself.
It was entirely possible she would have no problem in saying yes to anything and everything he had thought of. They had always been proud of how well they communicated so he decided it would be foolish not to let her know he was coming.
Maybe the real truth was that even after all these years she still made his heart pound and that made him feel like a kid. The last time they had gotten together he tripped in the parking lot and came close to smashing his face against a car.
One day that might have made for a funny story, but he was thankful not to have to tell it now.
Maybe if he didn’t love her it would be easier but he did and he hoped that one day they would share a life. Circumstances may have made it more challenging to get there but he figured that since they always found a way back to each other it was proof that one day back would lead to steady.