Sometimes You Are Pushy

She told him sometimes he was pushy and he smiled.

“You ought to be more humble. You can’t read my mind and know what I am going to do.”

“Who says I am not humble?”

“I do, it is obvious. You think I’ll swoon over you and do whatever it is you want me to do.”

“Nah, I don’t think so.”

He smiled and turned around to pretend to look out of the window. Let her wonder if he was serious. Let her wonder if he was thinking about kissing her or if he was going to be a ‘gentleman.’

A thousand years ago she had told him that sometimes it was fun to be pursued and that saying no added to the fun. He had told her that sometimes it made him crazy and he didn’t always like it.

He had also said when his girlfriend was in the mood for some dancing in the sheets it was fun to sometimes say no.

“How can you say that? It is awful. When a girl tries to start something with you it is time for you say yes. If you say no, you’ll give her a complex.”

He remembered smiling and telling her it wouldn’t hurt to understand what men go through.

“We get rejected all the time. How do you think that feels?

“I think that is just part of how it works.”

He shook his head and they tore into a conversation about glass ceilings and rights. Somewhere in between the comments about who was ridiculous and who was illogical they came to an agreement or maybe understanding is better.

“You better not ever say no to me. Besides, I’ll never say no to you.”

“Hah, you know how many times I have heard that line.”

“I mean it. You can’t keep up with me. I don’t have the same challenges men do.”

That moment stuck with him, in part because it wasn’t said to taunt or tease him. It was a statement of fact said without any pretense.

“You might not think I can wear you out, but we really don’t know yet now do we.”

An hour later he put her legs over his shoulders and told her in the name of science he was determined to get an answer.

She smiled and told him to stop talking.

The second time she called his name he realized he had been day dreaming and asked her to repeat herself.

“It is not nice to stop paying attention. What the hell were you thinking of?”

He mulled over whether she would appreciate the truth or if it was easier to just deflect and move on.

Or maybe instead of being graphic he could simply say he thought she was beautiful and leave it at that.

Except that was the thing, he couldn’t say those words without the past hanging over them. Couldn’t say she was beautiful without both of them remembering how those words had significant meaning because for a while “you are beautiful” had been code for ‘I love you.”

*****

Later on as he boarded his flight he thought about all that had happened and all they had shared.

He thought about how they had gotten back to the topic of pushy and how it led to bossy and all the other crazy directions their conversation had turned.

It had been one of moments where they recognized life was changing and that whatever decisions they made would reflect those changes.

As the captain announced they were free to take off their seat belts he leaned back in his seat and a broad smile broke across his face.

“We are going to be connected for life.”

“I know.”

“What does that mean?

“We’ll find out, now won’t we.”

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