Once upon a time he heard a story about an elderly woman who spoke longingly about a red haired boy.
None of her grandchildren knew who he was to her. They couldn’t say whether he was a lost love or lover or just some friend she once had.
At least one suspected that grandma had loved him deeply but not knowing more than that she had no way to figure out the particulars.
Most of the time she didn’t think twice about it but there were moments she wondered if maybe she and grandma shared more in common than they knew. Since grandma was long gone there wasn’t any way to make that determination which was too bad, because she was certain grandma could have offered excellent advice.
Back in her own world she had her own set of questions she thought about it but usually chose not to delve too deep because they took her to places that were uncomfortable.
There was a boy she was curious about. She tried hard not to let it show or to let him think she was because she wasn’t entirely certain what she wanted to do. If she showed too much interest she was certain he would take it the wrong way.
And that was problematic because he could cause chaos and she wanted simplicity.
The problem was she loved his brand of chaos and feared taking a chance because it was a storm that you couldn’t just control.
Sometimes she thought about asking him questions but his answers could be unsettling and obnoxious. He would tell her that when her legs were wrapped around him that he would gladly answer all of her questions.
Most of the time when he said such things she would push back hard and express her disgust but she wasn’t ever sure if she was angry with him for saying it or angry with herself for not going for it.
She never could decide if she was angrier with him for pushing or for not pushing hard enough.
Of course he never forgot the time she told him she would never forgive him for not finding her earlier.
Every now and then he thought about asking her if she really meant it, expecting her to deny it, but the thought of her saying yes made him cringe a little bit.
Life could be so damn simple and so complicated.
Would be nice to have her legs wrapped around him because for however long that moment lasted everything would make sense.
He remembered asking for a favor and being certain she would say no. When she smiled and said yes he almost fainted.
Thinking about it made him look at the reflection and admit that he had no real idea where life might take him.
It was safest to not expect her to be a part of it or so he thought. That made him think of how many times she told him about life would be a certain way until she changed her mind.
That made him think of how many times she told him about life would be a certain way until she changed her mind.
It brought a chuckle to his lips because he could see her tell him he was an idiot for thinking there was a possibility and an idiot for not believing there was.
As decisive as she might be that damn woman could still change her mind on a dime and try to make you believe you were just confused.