He didn’t know what he was doing or saying so he just wrote “come in my arms” and wondered if she would let herself do it.
Wondered if she would walk in, close her eyes and stand with him, holding each other.
There was still fire and still electricity there.
Maybe that was the problem.
Maybe that was the answer.
Maybe that was the solution.
So many maybes.
The man took a look at the letters he had written the woman and saw what she had and had not read.
So he took out a pen and started writing a new one.
“Baby, it is strange to feel so close and so far away. Sometimes I feel like nothing has changed and I can ask you to let me have your body for a while same as we used to do.
I remember all of you and how you would watch me. Sometimes I think about taking you by the hand and walking with you into our room.
I can picture you taking me in your mouth and smiling and I can picture the same smile as you wrapped your legs around me.
It still feels like it would be effortless for us to be together again and I know that even if you haven’t admitted it to me, you have thought about it.
Most of the time when these feelings come the overwhelming sense I have is of an incredibly deep connection because we know each other on the deepest and most intimate levels.
There is a trust between us that blows me away.
But if I said I never lusted after you it would be a lie because I still get that feeling too where the idea of never having you again makes me crazy.
Sometimes I don’t know how I keep from grabbing your hips and or wrapping my hands in your hair. It is chemical and maybe it is destiny too.
I know you don’t really buy into that and oftentimes I don’t either, but when it comes to you all bets are off.”
The man sat down at the keyboard and typed a note to a girl whose heart he once stole and asked her if she preferred to be kissed or bent over the couch.
“Or, I would gladly take you in the traditional style of missionaries and remind you what it is like to be properly made love to.
I could kiss the tears away, give you a place to be safe and take you on a journey into and through our world again. It still exists, it is still a home we can escape to and more than a fantasy.”
He looked at the words on the page and knew that it would touch her and that given a little ‘luck’ no matter what mood she was in it would impact things.
Granted the impact might vary dependent upon a few things but he knew she still liked partnering with him and occasionally appreciated letting go to be dominated.
She liked when he pushed back and took control. She liked submitting and would do so for him because they understood each other and knew how and where to give and take.
He was certain there had been more than a few moments where she would have liked to have collapsed into his arms and let him protect her.
Not because she was incapable of taking care of herself but because sometimes we need someone who we can let our guard down with and just be.
We don’t have to be strong all the time, sometimes we can be soft too.
The woman in the seat next to him asked if he wanted to play a game called “Airplane Secrets” and he said sure.
She told him the rules were they were not to exchange any information that could be used to identify them and that they would then share a secret only a stranger could hear.
He said ok and she said she would go first.
She said she had been sleeping with two different men for 5 years and that they didn’t know about each other.
“I am not in love with either, but I love them both.”
He asked her if she could fall in love with either.
“I think I could, but I don’t want to change anything. I like this arrangement. I like my life.
He took a deep breath and said he knew a woman intimately but hadn’t been intimate in years and wanted to try again.
“Are you just looking to get laid or do you want more,” she asked.
“I want to see what happens. I think we are long past just getting laid. We were best friends and sometimes I think we still are.”
“Does she want this too? Does she love you?”
“I am sure she loves me still, but whether she is in love might be questionable. I don’t think it would be hard for her to be with me physically or emotionally. But it is more complex than that.”
“Oh, so she is married.”
“Yep and when we let go we are addicted to each other in the best way.”
She looked at him and said it sounded like he needed the truth and to remember life is short.