Pictures, Thoughts & Ideas

shadow

“Relationships” are funny things in that your status impacts what is proper to share and what is not.

Take the picture above and think for a moment about what sort of response you might get from your girlfriend/wife as opposed to your neighbor or coworker.

If things are good with the girlfriend/wife you might be told it is funny and or be encouraged to act out the scene in real life.

And if things aren’t, well they may ignore the picture or let you know in no uncertain terms they don’t appreciate your having sent it over.

As for your neighbor or coworker, well this is where things can get really interesting because if they have a secret interest in you this sort of thing might lead to the kind of interaction that moves from fantasy into real life.

That is assuming it goes well and doesn’t turn into a restraining order, nasty note or time with HR.

So maybe you think it is better to go with something softer and more romantic.

Maybe something like one of these:

Sundays and Stuff
or
nerudakiss

Those have a certain style and pizzaz to them that lend themselves to painting a picture, a thought and an idea in a person’s head.

They might help move someone to take a chance on the idea and see where it goes or they might not.

You never can tell whether all you have is this idea or if it is something that is forever locked in lyric.

borntorun

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Carrying The Weight

The mind readers looked at his face and his words and tried to decipher the truth of what lay beneath the surface.

Fear kept them from a direct approach so they never came out and asked the question that potentially would have answered the question.

It was understandable because words spoken would lead to having to focus upon thoughts and ideas that had been in hibernation for eons.

Waking those from their slumber would rouse other things and require dealing with complications that might otherwise be ignored.

One could wander through that particular forest and come upon fragments of thoughts and ideas.

Maybe you’d stumble on Bowie doing Heroes and get trapped in an eternal discussion about whether the Heroes in his song were together for a traditional 24 hour day or something longer.

Or maybe you get caught up in a different spider web of thoughts and ideas about serenity, timing and the mystical and magical majesty of that one mythical kiss.

****

If ever the castle was built and lived in somewhere within the following words would have to be painted, written, spoken and or shared.

The unofficial but ever so important motto.

And in the end
The love you take
Is equal to the love
You make

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Stunning

Stunning.

That was the word and though he had expected her to look good because he had seen recent pictures he hadn’t expected that.

She looked stunning and he looked tired, old and worn.

The moment made him laugh because every time he thought he had figured it out and was prepared something made it clear that he hadn’t.

He supposed the good news was he didn’t have any expectation beyond that which made the moment easier.

No expectations made it easy or so he told himself.

“I am just going to do my thing and go about my business.”

A short time later he saw her looking at him and wished for the 1,838,839 time in his life that he could read minds.

“What the hell is she thinking? She looked away pretty quickly. Do I look that bad or do I look good?”

He flashed a smile, took a deep breath and walked away.

He was going to just keep doing his thing and go about his business, that was the theory.

But it sure would have be easier if she didn’t look so damn stunning.

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Some Things Simply Are

I don’t remember falling in love with her any more than I remember being born but they both happened and until death comes nothing will change that.

I used to think that was the sort of stupid comment made by the lonely or the lovesick and then life smacked me in the mouth and woke me up.

You either get it or you don’t and if you don’t get it there is no reason to try and explain it.

Believe me she and I have danced around and with this crazy thing for long enough that neither of us remember when we didn’t know the other existed.

Sometimes we have wished it wasn’t so and have tried to find ways to live alone and apart but it doesn’t ever work the way we want or think it should.

We get pulled back towards each other and find ourselves trying to figure out what the fuck happened.

You have to figure if we can’t figure it out there is no way you’ll get it and ultimately that is ok because we are the ones who have to determine what sort of life we want to lead together or apart.

There is an intensity and depth here that keeps us connected, even when we aren’t. Keeps us tied together even when we intentionally move away from each other.

And there is a sixth sense kind of think going on, an invisible thread we might not always acknowledge but we sure as hell feel.

Might be times where we lie to ourselves about it, but it is always there and it raises all sorts of interesting questions.

Can’t say how or if those questions will be answered, but they haven’t ever really gone away so I suspect at some point together or separately we’ll look into them.

Love burns, sometimes in the best way and sometimes in the hardest.

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You Have No Right

If I told you the full story and held nothing back you might say I have no right to make the request I have made.

For now I unwilling to share it all here because it is not mine to share, I am just one of the players in it.

If I chose to ignore the feelings of the others I could write it down and someday I hope to, but the time hasn’t come yet.

Don’t ask me to provide a timeline for when it might happen because it may never and even if it does, well we may choose not to say more than the few words we have shared.

What I know is that even though I have no right to ask I have, I did and I would do so again.

Once I was a tailor singing a song about a joyful surprise and now I no longer sing it. Perhaps I will again and perhaps I won’t.

The interesting part of life comes from not knowing what will happen now doesn’t it.

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Karma, Destiny Or Coincidence

Had some things happen in my life, ya know stuff that makes you ask questions and think about whether there is a bigger picture.

Something bigger, bolder and greater than us all.

Some days I am certain I know the answer and I see Karma and Destiny moving chess pieces and other days, well it is just coincidence.

But if you got an honest answer out of me I’d say the best test is a kiss.

That’s the one where you both get the most honest answer you can ever find but the thing is, sometimes you lie to yourself and sometimes you lie to others.

Honesty isn’t easy and it doesn’t always jibe well with the reality you seem to think you are living for and or under.

But it doesn’t mean you don’t know or that the person you kissed doesn’t know either because somethings can’t be proved in any court other than the heart.

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Serendipity Visits

angel-1502351
You told me long ago that you didn’t believe in fate, destiny or Karma.

Life was a series of events, moments in time sometimes punctuated by actions described as coincidence.

I believed as you did too because it made sense. I could prove it by touch, taste, sight, sound and feel until I couldn’t.

Because angels intervened and the heavens made me aware there was something more than just us.

Don’t care if anyone believes it but me.

Don’t need approval or validation to prove what my heart has known as truth for years.

blue-690872
We found each other under during a blue moon, under a night sky that held more stars than we could comprehend of.

I fought it for a while because it was easier and I thought smarter.

But that one kiss screwed up my plan and nothing has ever been the same.

Some would call it a blessing and some would call it a curse.

I call it serendipity.

And I call upon the voice inside our heads, the one that speaks in a voice only we can hear to verify this claim.

Because when the lights go out and we close our eyes this truth reveals itself to us again and again.

Love isn’t broken or beaten, only delayed.

 

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What Is Old Is New

If you are looking for recent posts involving Neil Diamond try Parallel OrbitsParallel Orbits otherwise here is an older piece that I am not sure was shared here.

For years you ruled your kingdom alongside your queen. It was both magical and mystical. You loved June so damn fiercely that it hurt to be apart from her. You called her your air as she did you. When she told you that no one else could take better care of you than she you smiled and your heart swelled with joy. It was impossible not to smile because you knew that it was true.

So you took her in your arms and promised her the same. You told her that you would love and honor her. You promised to cherish her and protect her. And you did, protect her. There are more than a few occasions upon which you were called upon to ride out the castle gates and meet those who wished her ill.

You didn’t care what the situation was or how badly the odds might be stacked against you. If June was threatened you were going to meet the challenge head on and do what was required to remove the danger. It wasn’t always easy for her to let you go.

It wasn’t just because she worried about Johnny’s safety but because of her own independence. June had never needed to rely upon another to take care of her problems. Her approval of Johnny’s actions were a testament to how deeply she loved him.

But life happens and things changed. One day Johnny and June left the castle and rode out into the forest. They stood beneath a moonlit sky and held hands. Their quiet moment was interrupted by howling. Johnny looked up and found several pairs of eyes staring back at him. Wolves. Not a wolf, but wolves.

You weren’t fazed by the presence of the wolves, not with June standing next to you. You didn’t worry about your own safety all you cared about was protecting your queen.  So you told her to get on the horse and ride for the safety of the castle walls. And when she protested you told her to stop fighting and to get the hell out.

Grudgingly she mounted your horse and began to ride. Less than a moment later you had your arms wrapped around the body of a wolf. And as you struggled to break his neck the rest of the pack attacked. Rolling in the dirt you wondered if she could hear your screams and hoped not.

Later on you would find yourself lying bloodied and bruised upon the forest floor. There was no sign of the wolves and you had no memory of what had happened to them. So you picked yourself up and wandered back towards the castle. Anxious to see June you maintained a quick pace and it wasn’t long before you arrived.

Only this time the castle gates were not open, nor did trumpets blare to herald your return. Instead you were met by silence. The castle was empty. June was gone and there wasn’t any sort of note to indicate where, when or why.

It would take time but eventually you would learn that she had moved on to another place. So you’d set out to go meet her there, it never occurring to you that your queen had intentionally moved. It took a long time to get to the new place, but you did find it. And when you did you discovered that June wasn’t interested in speaking with you.

You’d come to learn that things had happened and changes had come along with those things. June would tell you that she wasn’t going to spend time with you. But because you are Johnny you’d refuse to give up. You’d tell her that you didn’t believe her. You’d tell her that you were certain she was still your girl and that she was still in love with you.

You’d tell her that you knew she was pushing you away and that you thought that she was acting like an idiot. But you’d find that you couldn’t do much about it because sometimes people have to do things on their own. So you decided to wait. You’d make it clear to June that you still loved her. You’d try and take a long term approach and wait because you were convinced that it wasn’t done.

And in the darker moments you’d question your behavior and wonder if you were a fool. But there were also moments where you were certain that you weren’t. Love isn’t rational and it doesn’t work based upon logic.  So you’d wait because you remembered the secret world and knew that she did too. You’d wait and watch for the sign that maybe it wasn’t all in vain.

Who knew that one kiss could change two lives so dramatically.

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Parallel Orbits

She was morning, and I was night time
I one day woke up
To find her lying beside my bed
I softly said “Come take me”
For I’ve been lonely in need of someone
As though I’d done someone wrong somewhere
But I don’t know where, I don’t know where
Come lately
You are the sun, I am the moon
You are the words, I am the tune
Play me

Thought about writing Neil Diamond to ask if he’d help me have a real conversation.

In my head I explained it was a case of bad timing, circumstances and all of the craziness that comes with it.

Told him I needed his help in getting her attention long enough to have a real conversation, the kind that takes place face-to-face.

You know the one where you see their eyes and know you are being heard and they know you are listening.

In my head Neil asks some hard questions and asks me what I’d do if I got an answer I didn’t like.

“Neil, you know there are some loves that never end, they might be delayed or slowed down but they always come through.”

He looks at me and says he has heard stalkers say similar things. I thank him for the support and he starts singing Holly Holy.

I look at him and he smiles, when she hears this and sees the truth in your eyes you’ll find the right words.

“But Neil, what if I don’t. What if I stutter and or say something dumb. What if I forget who I am and why I am there?”

“Brother, I have been there. Had a moment with a long lost lady love in ’68 and I have never forgiven myself. But you won’t, you’ll figure it out and she’ll hear you. Just be honest. Any fool can see you love her, don’t worry about the words. Just speak and she’ll hear you, more importantly, she’ll see you.”

I thank him for his help, he asks me for more details about how it all happened and how we came to be where we are.

“I don’t know what to say other than we found and lost each other multiple times.”

He asks me to explain how two people can find and lose each other and I tell him we have had parallel orbits and I see a chance for intersection.

“Brother, I am a singer, not an astrophysicist. Just lay it out in simple terms.”

The conversation goes all night and into the next day but by the time we are done we have a plan and I know it can work.

Later on I wake up and wonder if I have watched too many romantic comedies and read too many books.

And as I walk down the hall to take care of my morning needs I hear Holly Holy and I know I may be crazy, but I am on the right path.

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Some Love Never Dies

Some love never dies, maybe it does dormant or quiets down for a while, but death is not something that applies to it.

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